You can tell summer has arrived because the English test cricket season has begun which is usually a mixed bag of bowling, rain and an occasional victory. The best part of this is the live commentary provided online by The Guardian which is a mixture of sarcasm, wit, arguing between the readers who mail in and once in a while a note or two about the actual game.

Take for example today’s commentary on the first day’s play between England and New Zealand.

15th over: New Zealand 47-0 (Richardson 15, Fleming 30)

Hoggard is supposed to be a swing bowler, but his deliveries are moving less than Cliff Richard’s hips on his last world tour. But, finally, after being tonked for another boundary, he produces a corker - which straightens and misses the bat by inches. More Coldplay talk. "Did you know why the baby was called apple? Because it was in cider for nine months! Boom boom!" says someone who wisely prefers to remain anonymous.