Recent early exits and late arrivals from working at home are convincing Patrick that I am ill and Grace and Nish that I am in actual fact having a lazy affair with someone. “Explain” it is in fact one of the Bollywood starlets in town for last Friday’s (muted) celebrations and subject deftly turns into a ‘Guess the bimbo’ contest. Or rather I mention a name and see how big an ‘ooh’ I get. For both boys and girls. Seems you can distinguish between the Meryl Streeps of Bollywood and the Denise Richards, so to speak. Thought they just all sang a lot and swayed about every now and again.

Revised cricket watching plans - am now booked in for two days of the second test in Calcutta. Marvellous.